But sometimes you're looking for the perfect idea for someone really special, and you need something creative and unique. Enjoy your new 7 day weekend Happy Retirement Quotes & Sayings In this section, you'll find both inspiring and funny retirement quotes you can add to a retirement greeting card message. Some call it retirement; I call it bliss. Betty Sullivan, In retirement, I look for days off from my days off. Mason Cooley, Its paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesnt appeal to anyone. Andy Rooney, Work is the curse of the drinking classes. Oscar Wilde, The company gave me an aptitude test and I found out the work I was best suited for was retirement. Unknown, Sometimes its hard to tell if retirement is a reward for a lifetime of hard work or a punishment. Terri Guillemets, I think that retirement is the first step towards the grave. Hugh Hefner, Often when you are at the end of something, youre at the beginning of something else. Fred Rogers, Retirement is not in my vocabulary. Police chief: Do you have any leads or suspects for the murder case? Gene Perret, "My father calls acting 'a state of permanent retirement with short spurts of work.'" A cop gives a woman a speeding ticket, and she wants to know why he didnt give her a warning first. They aren't going to get rid of me that way." Unknown, "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want." What happens when a police officer goes to bed? Before you die, give. It is the beginning of the open highway. Unknown, Dont act your age in retirement. Before he knows it, the bridge is right in front of him and his truck gets wedged under it. Scott Elledge, Retired is being twice tired, Ive thought first tired of working, then tired of not. I thought retiring was when you are tired and go to bed." Present This to You as a Symbol of A man went to the Police Station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. Here are a couple of one liners that you may be able to use: "I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.". happy days are here at last! The retired guy goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I ache all over. To display your contact list, you must sign in: It's St. Patrick, a Perfect Time to Be Punny! George Burns Retirement life: seen it all, done it all - Can't remember most of it! Larry Laser, "Working people have a lot of bad habits, but the worst of these is work."

Are There Monkeys On Isla Mujeres, Temptations Bowls With Lids, Pistol Permit References Erie County, Articles F